


The Baby and The Idiot

by plant_boi_potter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Baby Teddy - Freeform, Basically married, Drarry, Fic in a Day, Fluff, Gen, Grimmauld Place, M/M, Metamorphmagus, Unedited fic, Wizarding World, Word Count: 1000-2000, how they sorted out how got custody of Teddy Lupin, mild swearing, not yet together, romione, slight angst, smol gay disasters, sort of kid fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 22:30:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17569145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plant_boi_potter/pseuds/plant_boi_potter
Summary: Draco sometimes thinks he's the only competent person in this house.Sometimes, people are inclined to agree with him.





	The Baby and The Idiot

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a wonderful prompt by [ tangentqueenofdragons](https://tangentqueenofdragons.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Ever want to know what a fic looks like unedited?  
> (Answer: not good - if it's mine).

1.  
"He's my cousin, Potter!"  
"I'm his Godfather, Malfoy!"  
They'd been having the same argument in the waiting room for a good ten minutes and it had been going around in circles, so when the Secretary finally called them in it was almost a relief.  
The room was airy and spacious, a large, solid desk accommodating the middle of it. Two plush chairs sat facing it. Harry moved to sit but Draco loitered near the door, hands clasped firmly behind his back. He focused on the casement windows lining the far wall.  
"Excuse me, may you come sit down?" Draco flinched, unclasping his hands automatically. He turned, standing aside from the door as a large woman bustled through it. She shifted the blue binder she was carrying into her left arm as Draco reached for her hand.  
She shook it, smiling warmly so small crinkles appeared at the sides of her eyes. "You must be Draco Malfoy, I'm Heather. Take a seat." Heather gestured to the armchair next to Harry's. He was sitting with his ankle on his knee. Draco shook his head before moving to sit opposite the desk.  
Heather moved to take her place on the other side of the desk, reaching down to shake Harry's hand.  
"Hello there, I'm Heather, Harry Potter?" She said it like a question. Draco almost laughed. Instead he let his eyes stray to the markings on the desk as Heather spoke.  
"I assure you that the process is efficient as we can make it but there will be forms and documentation you'll both need to sign to confirm..." Draco's eyes strayed to the stacks of papers on her desk, carefully counting each one that was placed in the perfect piles.  
Harry also didn't seem to be listening quite as intently as he should have. He twiddled his thumbs around each other as Heather talked, eyes flicking over Draco every now and then.  
Harry turned, unclasping his hands in favour of sliding them down his jeans to grasp the lower portion of his leg. "Draco? What do you think?"  
Draco's head shot up. "Pardon?"  
"I said-"  
"I heard what you said, Potter. Why are you asking my opinion now? Is it because we're in front of someone that can prove you wrong?"  
A memory surged forward.  
"Scared, Potter?"  
"You wish." Harry answered softly before resuming his conversation with Heather.

***

"Are we actually doing this then?" Harry asked as Draco stepped into the foyer. They'd come to an agreement at last, through all the arguing and disarray.  
Heather had almost convinced them living together wouldn't be that bad. They could take care of Teddy like that after all. 

2  
Harry rolled over, his head pressed against the pillow. Teddy was crying again. He'd been up three times throughout the night to feed him or cuddle him but he felt like he wasn't getting anywhere.  
Harry had finally relented to sleeping in Draco's bed so they could be closer to Teddy. But that was all, he swore it.  
He felt Draco shift, his side of the bed coming up from it's previous dip. "I'll do it." He sounded tired, but nonetheless he scooped Teddy from his crib.  
Harry sighed in relief as he nestled his head back into the bed, moving his leg so he wasn't so cramped as usual.  
The noises in the hall had quietened down. They hadn't come back yet. Harry didn't care. He had the bed all to himself and it was almost a relief, until he faded into dreams. He woke and Draco wasn't there.  
He panicked until he raised his head. Spotting the thin strip of light under the door, he managed to settle again.  
The humming was relaxing, he thought as he grabbed his glasses, sliding out of bed. He wanted to check on Teddy, that was all, tell Draco to bring him back to bed. But as Harry cracked the door open, he couldn't bring himself to ask.  
Teddy was breathing heavily, relaxed in Draco's arms as he rocked him back and forth, humming a lullaby that Harry had never heard. 

"What is that?" He said softly.  
Draco coloured pink. "My mother used to sing it to me when I was a little boy. It's about you-"  
Harry guffawed.  
"If you're going to laugh I suggest you take it outside, you are NOT waking Teddy up!" Draco hissed.  
Harry keeled over, hand over his mouth. "If I'd known that in first year..." He petered off, eyes shining. "I'm sorry."  
He didn't look sorry. 

He retreated back to bed, snuggling into the duvet, falling asleep to Draco's soft hum.

3  
***8 Months Later***

"Guess who had to go get the shopping - again!" Draco all but dropped the bags onto the counter, sending a bag of apples rolling to the floor.  
He heard Harry's muffled excuse from upstairs, something about tucking Teddy in and an offhanded comment about him being too loud. A chuckle followed suit and Draco knew Teddy wasn't even asleep yet.  
"It's not my fault that you don't keep your own bloody pantry stocked."  
"Our pantry, Draco." Harry corrected. He'd materialised at the bottom of the stairs, chubby toddler in arms.  
Draco smiled as he took Teddy by the middle, hair shimmering lightly until it was platinum blond.  
"Dwaco!"  
As Draco bounced Teddy on his hip, Harry went to stock the pantry. It was, even he'd admit, alarmingly empty.  
"What the hell is this."  
Draco covered Teddy's ears without hesitation. "Language, Potter. And that, is a vegetable." He shifted Teddy onto his hip and nodded at the parsnip that was currently in Harry's hand.  
"Can you even cook?"  
"I can try." Draco's mouth lifted into a half smile as Teddy reached out.  
It was Harry's turn to laugh as Draco's hair was tugged mercilessly. He glared at the baby before lowering him on the counter next to the sink.  
"Ok. We can Owl Hermione. She can come do it."  
Harry let out an exasperated noise - something between a groan and a sigh. 

***

"Come on 'Mione, you've got to help me. House sharing with him is a disaster."  
Draco had an urgent call from work, but he had flooed in to apologise, which Hermione was grateful for. Harry just took off.  
She was glaring at him now as he spoke.  
"I have to put up with Ronald's idiocy, I think Draco can put up with yours."  
"What? Don't take his side! I-"  
They were cut off by a yelp in the living room. "Harry! Your Godson has MY FACE!"  
Sure enough, as everyone piled into the living room, there was Teddy Lupin, looking triumphant with his golden brown freckles and mop of shock-orange hair.  
"Oh my-" Hermione rushed forward, seizing Teddy who immediately sulked. "Ron!"  
Harry couldn't help but remember the time almost this exact scenario played out between him and Draco.  
Then it clicked.  
"Fuck."  
A chorus of "Harry!" ensued. Teddy looked delighted that everyone was paying attention to his Godfather.  
"We're basically married."  
Ron sat on the sofa, bringing his head to his knees. "Congratulations, you're officially the last one to know."  
"What."  
"You agreed to live together, you're Co-parenting, you yell at him for stupid stu-"  
Harry cut across him before he could continue the tirade about Harry's oblivious nature.  
"Yeah, but-"  
"You could have had a custody battle and you both opted for what was basically couples counselling."  
"Draco said it would be better!"  
"And was it?" Draco dusted himself off as the floo expelled him onto the carpet, leaving green smoke for Teddy to try and grab.  
"Yeah... I suppose it was."


End file.
